Long Read
10 Things You Must Know Before Moving to Santiago (From Someone Who Hunts Ghosts in Your Future Apartment)
look, santiago’s the kind of city where your shower faucet drips in morse code and your studio apartment was DEFINITELY a dentist’s office during the pinochet years. i’m not here to sell you vibes-i’m here because ol’ mate at /r/SantiagoChile told me three buildings on my block collapsed during the 1985 earthquake, and buddy, the spirits are STILL pissed about it.
*where the shadows hang out (neighborhood vibes)
barrio yungay’s where you’ll find casas chorizo-those skinny shotgun houses built for mistresses and tuberculosis patients. rent’s $600/month if you don’t mind poltergeists rearranging your thrift-store furniture. but skip providencia unless you enjoy $12 avocado toast screamed over startup bros debating crypto.
overheard at la piojera (that dive bar): “the ghosts in estación central train station? nah, they’re chill. it’s the pickpockets near plaza de armas that’ll gut you.”
| Thing | Cost (USD) | Haunting Tax |
|---|---|---|
| 1-bedroom | $450-$800 | +1 sleep paralysis demon |
| microbrew | $4 | historic yeasts from 1890s breweries |
| metro ride | $1.20 | spectral accordion players |
yes, unemployment’s hovering at 7%, but if you’re cool with freelancing as a English teacher/exorcism side-hustler, you’ll survive. check these grupo facebook gigs for sketchy-but-paying gigs.cold spots & hot tempers (weather & social stuff)
winter here feels like a grumpy aunt who can’t decide between a sweater and a sun hat-july smog sits in your lungs like a charcoal briquette. and sorry, your california "chill" won’t survive the oktober protests near plaza italia where students riot with more commitment than my tinder dates.
drunk advice from a cemetery gardener: "always carry change for the stray dogs-they’re reincarnated revolutionaries."
ice bonus: valparaíso’s crusty port energy is 90 minutes away. buenos aires? 2-hour flight for empanada rehab.
before you sign that lease, lurk on this
remember: santiago doesn’t care about your hygge dreams*. it’s a beautiful, choking, electric cemetery. bring inhalers.
You might also be interested in:
- https://topiclo.com/post/santa-barbara-sunrise-and-salty-breezes
- https://topiclo.com/post/parttime-job-opportunities-for-students-in-el-alto-a-yogainstructors-overcaffeinated-rumsipping-guide
- https://topiclo.com/post/10-things-you-must-know-before-moving-to-so-paulo-no-fluff-just-real-talk-from-a-photographer
- https://topiclo.com/post/is-bukavu-overrated-a-reality-check-for-newcomers-seriously-dont-say-yes
- https://topiclo.com/post/daegu-salary-reality-check-is-grinding-here-even-worth-paying-rent