Commute Times in Kabul: How Long Will You Spend in Traffic (and Maybe Your Sanity?)

okay, so, like, Kabul. right? it’s… intense. i just got back, and honestly, my brain feels like scrambled eggs mixed with dust. i’m pretty sure i’m still shedding a little bit of grit. i was supposed to be documenting the textile trade, but mostly i just documented the traffic. and let me tell you, it’s a thing. a serious, soul-crushing thing.

seriously, i’m a touring session drummer - i’ve seen some traffic, believe me - but this was… different. it’s not just slow; it’s a slow, simmering, existential dread kind of slow. i’m talking 45 minutes to get from the airport to the relatively decent part of the city, and that’s on a good day. a ‘good day’ being defined as ‘not actively being shot at.’ which, you know, is a pretty low bar.

I spent a week trying to figure out the patterns, and it’s a mess. it’s not like predictable rush hour. it’s more like… sporadic bursts of chaos punctuated by moments of eerie, unsettling calm. the drivers are… assertive. let’s leave it at that. i think i saw one guy honk his horn for a solid five minutes straight at a parked car. it was… something.

*Here’s the data i managed to scrape together (mostly from asking around and staring intensely at Google Maps):

(Source: A very unreliable collection of conversations and a slightly broken GPS. Don’t quote me on the 120+ minute commute.)

I’m telling you, if you’re planning on living in Kabul, you need a serious tolerance for delays. and a really good audiobook. or a really good therapist. or both.

Neighborly Gossip (Drunk Advice, circa 3 AM):

“Don’t go near Karte Sakhi. Seriously. Just… don’t. Heard a story about a guy who took a shortcut and ended up… well, let’s just say it involved a very angry goat and a lot of shouting.” - Old Man Karim, tea stall owner

“The traffic around the Presidential Palace? Forget about it. It’s like a parking lot. And the guards… they don’t mess around.” - Fatima, taxi driver

Something a Local Warned Me About: Seriously, the potholes. They’re not just potholes; they’re craters. You could lose a small car in one. And they’re everywhere. It’s like the city is actively trying to swallow your tires.

Okay, okay, let’s talk about the cost of living. It’s… manageable, if you’re careful. I’m talking around $400-$800 a month for a decent apartment (depending on location, obviously), plus food, utilities, and the inevitable bribes. Here’s a rough breakdown:

Expense Category	Estimated Monthly Cost ($)
Rent (1-bedroom)	300-600
Food	200-400
Utilities (electricity, water)	50-100
Transportation (taxi/fuel)	100-200
Internet/Mobile	30-50

(Source: A very optimistic budgeting spreadsheet and a few suspiciously accurate observations.)

Quick Links for the Curious:

*TripAdvisor: https://www.tripadvisor.com/Tourism-g298398-Kabul-Vacations.html
*Yelp: https://www.yelp.com/search?query=restaurants+in+Kabul&sort_by=popular_now
*Reddit (Kabul Subreddit):* https://www.reddit.com/r/Kabul/

Seriously, check out the subreddit. It’s… informative. And slightly terrifying.

And, you know, if you’re looking for a change of scenery, there’s always Bamyan, about a 3-hour drive away. Or Herat, a bit further. They’re both… different. Let’s just say Bamyan has a lot more mountains. And Herat has a lot more… everything.

Anyway, that’s my take on Kabul traffic. It’s a slow burn, a frustrating grind, and a constant reminder that sometimes, the best thing to do is just… breathe. Or maybe invest in a really, really good scooter. Or a rocket. I’m not judging.

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