Kolkata's Humidity and My Questionable Life Choices: A Botanist's Ramblings
okay, so kolkata. where do i even begin? i just checked and it's… a damp hug right now. seriously, the air feels like a warm, wet blanket. i’m a botanist, i appreciate humidity, usually. but this? this is a whole other level. my hair is permanently frizzy, my glasses are perpetually steamed up, and i’m pretty sure my camera lens is developing its own ecosystem.
I came here chasing rumors of a particularly rare orchid, Aeranthes grandiflora, supposedly thriving in some forgotten corner of the *Botanical Garden. Turns out, the rumors were… partially true. I found a grandiflora, but it was looking a little sad, like it’d given up on life. Which, honestly, I can relate to sometimes.
I spent a ridiculous amount of time wandering around the garden, dodging rogue squirrels and trying not to trip over ancient statues. It’s massive, you guys. Like, you could get lost in there for days. I almost did. I ended up having a surprisingly deep conversation with a groundskeeper named Raj about the existential dread of pruning roses. He seemed to understand.
Speaking of locals, if you get bored of the city, Siliguri and Kharagpur are just a hop, skip, and a jump away. I considered a quick detour to see some tea plantations, but the thought of battling the humidity again was just too much.
I overheard something at a chai stall - apparently, the Victoria Memorial is haunted. Drunk advice, probably, but it did make me look over my shoulder a few times. Someone told me that the best way to experience kolkata is to just get lost and see what happens. I tried that. It mostly resulted in me buying a questionable amount of street food and accidentally joining a wedding procession. No regrets.
My gear list, because apparently, I need to be organized about something:
*Camera: (obviously) - currently battling mildew. Send help.
*Field notebook: Filled with frantic scribbles and orchid sketches.
*Mosquito repellent: Industrial strength. Seriously, the mosquitoes here are relentless.
*Wide-brimmed hat: Essential for sun and rain protection.
*Reusable water bottle: Staying hydrated is key in this climate.
*A healthy dose of skepticism: For all the rumors and tall tales.
I also stumbled upon this amazing little shop selling vintage botanical prints. It’s called “The Green Leaf” and it’s tucked away on Park Street. You can find it here: https://www.yelp.com/biz/the-green-leaf-kolkata. Seriously, go. It’s a treasure trove.
And then there’s the food. Oh, the food. I’ve been living on jhal muri and mishti doi. It’s… an experience. I’m pretty sure I’ve gained five pounds just from street snacks. But it’s worth it. I found a fantastic place for Bengali sweets - check out https://www.tripadvisor.com/Restaurant_Review-g298204-d1647883-Reviews-6_Chowringhee_Sweet_Centre-Kolkata_Calcutta_West_Bengal.html. Don’t miss it.
I’m also trying to learn a bit of Bengali. It’s… challenging. I managed to order coffee without completely embarrassing myself, which I’m counting as a major victory. I found a local language exchange group - https://www.meetup.com/Kolkata-Language-Exchange/. Maybe I’ll actually learn something before I leave.
One thing a local warned me about? Don't trust anyone who offers you a shortcut through Bow Barracks. Apparently, it's a maze of confusing alleyways and you'll end up even more lost than you already are. Wise words.
Anyway, I’m off to find another orchid (and maybe some more mishti doi*). Wish me luck. And send sunscreen.