pyramids, sweat, and a confused tourist (me)

so i’m sitting here in giza, egypt, which is basically cairo’s cooler older sibling who peaked in 2500 BCE and hasn’t bothered to update their LinkedIn since. i just checked and it’s...15.42°C right now, hope you like that kind of thing. feels like 14.27°C though, which explains why my hands are numb while typing this. someone told me that if you stare at the pyramids too long, you start hallucinating camel vendors offering you ‘special’ tea, but honestly, that might just be the sleep deprivation talking.

the pyramids are stupid big. like, ‘why did anyone think this was a good idea’ big. the great pyramid of khufu has sides angled at 51 degrees, which is coincidentally the same angle my jaw dropped when i saw it. the entrance is 59 feet up, which is also how high my skepticism flew when they said it was built by hand. spoiler: it’s still there.

weather? it’s a desert. surprise. summers hit 40°C (104°F), which is basically ‘sit still and melt’ season. winters are chill-literally. if you get bored, cairo’s just a short drive away, where you can trade ancient dust for modern traffic jams. the nile’s right there too, looking all ‘i birthed civilization’ smug about it.

someone told me the windstorms here will steal your hat, your sunscreen, and maybe your will to live if you’re not careful. also, the locals have mastered the art of side-eyeing tourists who try to climb the pyramids. fair.

the most remarkable thing? these giant triangle graves are still standing after 4,500 years. meanwhile, my ikea shelf collapsed after six months. humanity’s really gone downhill.

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