tarlac city smells like burnt espresso and bad decisions (a coffee snob’s diary)

your boy’s in the philippines chasing that *third-wave caffeine dragon and honestly? tarlac’s humidity just slapped me across the face. i just checked my phone and it’s 29 and change here right now, but your face might melt off because these tropics don’t play.

some tattooed dude at Joe’s Brew whispered that the owner imports beans smuggled in guitar cases-check their sketchy yelp page if you don’t believe me. heard a rumor from a guy who fixes motorcycles that the best espresso is buried behind Tarlac Market (here’s tripadvisor’s take on that chaos).

if you need a break from the caffeine shakes, Angeles City’s wild nightlife or San Fernando’s weirdly soothing traffic jams are close enough to sweat through your shirt reaching.

oh-and someone at Café Kapeng Bato (which is just a shed with wifi, see photos) told me their barista won some underground latte art competition using a toothpick. i tried their cold brew and now my left eye twitches when i hear mariah carey songs. solid 7/10.

final verdict: come for the kibal pancit* at L’Fisher Hotel’s dodgy café, stay because the humidity glues you to plastic chairs.

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