udaipur is just a bunch of canals and people who hate it
i woke up to the sound of someone muttering in hindi outside my window and immediately wondered if they were trying to start a gang or just very angry about the heat. it was 19 degrees but felt like someone dipped the air in sweat and handed it to me. not the worst, i guess. i just checked and it's 19 degrees right now, hope you like that kind of drenchy-musty thing. the kind where you smell like a damp sock and regret not wearing more layers.
last night i passed a boutique selling clothes from the 90s and bought a shirt that looked like it belonged to a person whoPBSed through a monsoon. the guy at the counter said it was "vintage" but i think he meant " Collector's item from someone who hated themselves." whatever. it's comfy enough to sleep in, right? probably not. jeans and a travel blanket are my real style now.
yesterday i took a walk and saw this old building with peeling paint and a sign that said " closed for 12 years." insane. i wandered in and found a guy painting a mural of a cat wearing sunglasses. he said it was for a local barista who quit his job to live in a van. i asked if the cat was real, and he said no, it was a metaphor for freedom. which is either genius or wasted paint, depending on who you ask.
the neighbors? they're a mix of retirees who play bingo at 3 am and a guy who claims he's a secret spy. i heard through the grapevine (or was it a drunk telling me this?) that his "mission" involves leaving ketchup packets in strangers' shoes. i told him i'm not interested in being part of that circus.
i heard that the local hostel has a secret room filled with yoga mats and incense. someone told me that if you drink the water from the fountain at midnight, you'll meet your soulmate or get arrested. i'm 50/50. either way, i'm sticking to bottled water and regret.
if you get lost, try not to ask directions. the people here will either laugh at you or tell you a story about a goat that ate a judge's shoe. both options sound like a solid life plan. jai pur is a short drive away, and honestly, their chaat is better than pretending to care about this place.
someone said the airport taxis charge you extra for asking about the weather. i didn't believe it until i asked and got charged 200 rupees for clarifying if it was "feels like" or "actual" temperature. ridiculous.
i took some photos of the canals because the light was weird and I'm terrible at explaining why. here they are:
. the cat one is probably the best, even if it's just a blurry blob.
i left a review on tripadvisor about the hostel's "mysterious ghost smells" but it hasn't been published yet. maybe it's too weird. or maybe i just don't want to be associated with that.
later i decided to go to a market and ended up buying a plant. not because i'm a botanist, but because it had leaves that looked like they were trying to escape. i named it maria. she's fin.
the weather here is like a bad ex-unpredictable, slightly damp, and constantly reminding you that you made a bad choice. but somehow, you stay. because you have nothing else. or so i told myself as i walked back to my place at 2 am, wondering if i'd forgotten my jacket. again.
essayer a即使 you fail. that's the xanax of travel. you don't need a plan. you just need to exist in the middle of the chaos and hope no one judges your life choices too hard.
you can find more about udaipur's weirdness here:. and if you're brave enough, maybe check out that spy guy's ketchup scheme. it's either genius or a disaster. probably both.
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