Baghdad’s biggest employers: a drumstick’s-eye view of who’s paying the bills (and who’s not)
so i rolled into *Baghdad last week with my snare drum strapped to a tuk-tuk and immediately got schooled on how this city really runs. spoiler: it ain’t just oil money and kebabs.
you know that moment when the desert heat slaps you like a wet cymbal? 47°C yesterday. my drum keys literally melted. but hey, at least the KAR Group headquarters has AC colder than my ex’s heart - they’re the energy giants hiring everyone with two legs and a pulse. overheard at a shisha spot near Al-Mansour Mall: "they’ll take anyone who can spell ‘petroleum’ backwards, habibi" (source: some guy named Ahmed who owes me 10,000 IQD).
here’s the dirty backbeat:
- Asiacell (telecom) employees 3k+ people and apparently gives out free SIM cards like candy. drunk advice: "use their wifi to download drum plugins - way faster than your landlord’s connection"
- Baghdad Soft Drinks Co. runs the Pepsi empire here. rumor has it their factory workers get unlimited soda. pancreatic horror or dream job? you decide.
- Al-Bunnia Group (construction) is building so many towers, my cousin’s cousin got hired just for holding a measuring tape sideways.
check the local Baghdad Jobs Facebook group - it’s wilder than a 4am drum solo. last week someone posted looking for a "financial analyst who can also fix accordions."
rent near these big companies? $400/month for a box that could fit my kick drum, two pizza boxes, and existential dread. but hey, Erbil's just a 45-minute flight north if you need to escape your boss’s cousin’s nephew who got promoted over you.
overheard at Shabandar Café: "they say Ministry of Oil employees get subsidized gasoline - pour it straight into your morning coffee for maximum efficiency" (unverified, but hilarious). check the r/Iraq subreddit for more questionable career tips.
final note: Zawraa Bank* just opened a branch that looks like a spaceship. applied for a loan to fix my drum throne. they said no, but told me about this weirdly specific Yelp page reviewing banks like they’re nightclubs.
gotta run - got a gig playing shareholder meetings. pro tip: never make eye contact with CFOs during ballads.
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