olinda's sticky heat and questionable umbrellas

i woke up to the smell of salt and everything was sticky outside. it's 24 degrees but feels like 30. my laptop was already sweating. the parade was supposed to start but it got rained out. some guy on the street was selling umbrellas with pictures of owls. i don't know why.

i just checked the weather app and it's like a sauna outside, hope you like that kind of thing. the humidity is so high it makes my skin feel like it's wearing a second layer of meme. my neighbors? they’re probably out there hydrating with coconut water and judging my life choices from their air-conditioned balconies. i heard that the local bakery’s owner is a former circus performer. some woman told me that at a bar last night. who knows?

if you get bored, brazil is just a short drive away, but honestly, i’m not sure i want to leave this place. the chaos here is different. like, it’s the kind where you can randomly find a street artist painting a giant banana on a wall and then immediately forget it existed the next day. i saw that happen. yeah.

someone told me the coffee shop on main street serves a drink called ‘the serotoninƒ’ which is basically espresso mixed with lavender and regret. i haven’t tried it but i’m 70% sure it’s a lie. rumors aside, the place is decent. i saw a review on tripadvisor that said it’s ‘the most authentic experience you’ll get without leaving your bladder.’ that’s a compliment, right?

i snapped a few photos of the street at night. one had a red crescent moon in the sky. another was a man working on a piece of metal. i don’t know what he was making but it looked important. the third? well, the third was a cat fighting a pigeon. that’s Olinda for you.

i also saw this photo of a city street filled with lots of traffic at night. it was so chaotic it felt authentic. another image showed a man working on a piece of metal. maybe he was making a sword? probably not. the third was a red crescent moon. that’s unofficial Olinda weather, i guess.

if you’re into chaos, check out the local board where people post random things. i saw a post about a free yoga class in the park. it was probably a scam but i’m here for it. links? sure. check out the olinda travel guide on yelp for more tips. or maybe the local fb group? they’re always complaining about the smell of the ocean. which is weird because the ocean is nearby and also amazing. but whatever.

i bought a coffee from a place called ‘café do caos’ after reading a review that said it’s ‘the most existential place in south america.’ i’ll take that as a win. the barista was juggling three things at once and spoke in riddles. i think he was trying to sell me a prophet.

in conclusion, olinda is a place where the weather is a character. the neighbors are either monks or people who haven’t left their apartments in years. and the reviews? they’re all over the place. some say it’s magical, others swear it’s a trap. i liked the trap. it’s messy. it’s human. and it’s probably wet.

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